I need to forgive myself for all the times I chose myself. ((Having wine nights to an excess and being outside smoking cigars/cigarettes and chatting on the phone)) Instead of putting my kids to bed, reading to my kids, etc. Even though Daddy was with them, as a mother, I have so much guilt over the nights I missed nights putting my babies to bed and cuddling with them. They're now 10 & 12 yrs old